© my mad little family

the joy and delight of william hunter howell.

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9 Tidbits of Festive-Themed Epicaricacy For You (#spectacularchristmasfails)

 

 

When you're a kid, Christmas is the best thing ever. Literally. It's even better than eating Nutella out of the jar with a serving spoon. It's running around a house that's jam-packed with decorations, it's believing your Dad when he tells you Santa prefers beer to milk, it's trying to fall asleep on Christmas Even with a heart pounding so hard it's like you've took a shot of adrenaline to the heart and it's waking up in wee-soaked bed because a) you couldn't contain the anticipation anymore and b) your parents told you not to come out (in case they got caught). 

 

The you leave home and go to college and the magic gets lost, by which we mean you hang a Christmas tree shaped air freshener from the ceiling and stack your presents under that. Essentially, Christmas is more about getting nailed at midnight mass, waking up with a hangover and trying not to be sick in church while people sing hymns with made up words (sungen and rungen are not words). A couple of years, you even get dressed up as an elf and go clubbing on Christmas night because you have nothing else to do. 

 

Then the best thing happens. You have kids and Christmas takes on a whole new meaning; it sort of reverts back to the magical one of your childhood except you are the smile-creating magician responsible for decorating the house and coming up with new traditions to make this the best 24 days in the calendar year. 

 

With that in mind, we thought we would bring you some of the best intentions Christmas has to offer, made better by the fact they didn't quite pan out the way they were expected too. After all, what's Christmas without munching on mince pieces and laughing at a few festive mishaps?

 

 

1. "Let it snow" wrapping paper always was a bit cliched...

 

 

2. And Grandma's table laying is once again the highlight of Christmas...

 

 

3. Nothing says Christmas like an army of teddy bears that stare directly into your soul... 

 

 

 

4. Have a holly, jolly Christmas everyone... 

 

 

 

5. I will award 10 points to anyone that can find me a creepier Christmas decoration... 

 

 

6. You know what, Santa, I'm gonna skip the treacle this time...

 

 

 

7. I'm pretty sure this kid hasn't fully inspected his jumper because, well, just look at Santa...

 

 

 

8. I just want normal fairy lights, is that too much to ask...

 

 

 

9. And here it is, how every student spends Christmas...

 

 

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